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And whisper in their sleeping ears...

We were here, we were here

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Send in the Tigers is the new home for bachelorno4171...

Scene: A dishevelled and unshaved writer nervously enters an executive's office. He's carrying a script. At the desk sits a movie company suit with 80s flicked hair and trendy glasses. He glares at the writer and points for him to to sit down.

Exec: You have 30 seconds. Speak!
Writer: Well, it's the story of a guy from London who, at the age of 30, sells his house, leaves his great job and goes off to Australia to meet his real family. Only when he gets there, he realises that... you know... they're a bit odd too. So he starts off in Brisbane, and it doesn't compare favourably to London, then he gets this job as editor of a newspaper in a shitty country town in Queensland and his life just... you know... starts falling apart. But as it is, he starts to see it's real beauty.
Exec (looking annoyed and perplexed): This is your story? How is this funny, or sad, or moving?
Writer: Erm... well, he has a sidekick. A female dog called Jarrah! She comically bares her teeth at people, like Queen of the Damned...
Exec (calming down): Jarrah huh? Can Jarrah talk?
Writer: Uhm... well... do you want her to?
Exec: How does it end?
Writer: Well, that I'm not sure of yet. It's kind of an organic thing... i was just going to see where it went.
Exec: Forget it, it'll never work. Where's the sex? And more to the point - where are the zombies?